Holy God,
Creating the world,
With potential and possibility,
You took a risk.
Coming to earth as a human,
You didn’t take the easy route.
You came, helpless as a baby,
In vulnerability and fragility.
You didn’t take the easy route,
You spoke out against injustice,
You challenged people,
Not speaking just what they wanted,
or doing what they wanted.
You sought to do the will of God the Father.
You didn’t take the way of living for self,
But you took the way of self denial,
Seeking to serve others and loving them.
You didn’t take the easy route,
Comfortable and pain free.
But you took the way of suffering and pain,
The path you walked was hard.
So as disciples today, we make choices and decisions.
May we seek to respond not just to our own wishes and desires.
May we seek to do the will of you God.
Remind us that you too took a risk- so sometimes too we need to risk.
Help us to remember, that you took the path of vulnerability and weakness.
Help us to remember that the call to follow Jesus is not easy, but that you promise to be with us.
Help us to remember that we are parts of the body of Christ. May we look to do what is best for the body- in developing the kingdom.
Help us to know- whatever decisions we make we are children of God, held by God and loved by God.
God of adventure,
You call people to adventure and journey with you.
A journey that may seem crazy or impossible.
May I know that you are Immanuel- God with us.
Help me as a follower of Jesus, as a pilgrim to follow where you call.
Knowing that where I am- you are too.
Help me to know- to seek and do your will.
In Jesus’ name, who walked the path of humanity as we do.
AMEN
Monday, 11 February 2008
Sunday, 10 February 2008
Thursday Tea Time
I spoke this week at a mid week fellowship meeting at Hinde Street. The title given to my talk by the organiser was "Why I want to be a Minister".... mmm an interesting title- sounds as if being a minister was something that I decided I wanted to do! Well yes I had a choice in my response- but it was a sense of call not just a what shall I do with my life! It was interesting for me to talk through my sense of call and journey. With candidating it became a regular feature but to look back now 9 months since the last time I spoke publically about it, its very much a continuing sense of call. Its now 6 and a 1/2 years since my first initial sense of call and in fact 6 years ago today was Youth Sunday. This particular Sunday became of significance- one of my ministers at the time asked after me being involved in leading worship- have you thought about full time ministry as a possibility?! Until that point I hadn't spoken to anyone about it and even then kept quiet! How did he know the journey that I was on internally!
Any way I could write my full testimony here- but not tonight it'd take a while. Have been thinking that it might be a good idea- some people who were around at my initial sense of call probably haven't heard the story because it wasn't really till I went to Lancaster that I spoke publically to circuit meetings etc about my sense of call!
Any way I could write my full testimony here- but not tonight it'd take a while. Have been thinking that it might be a good idea- some people who were around at my initial sense of call probably haven't heard the story because it wasn't really till I went to Lancaster that I spoke publically to circuit meetings etc about my sense of call!
Chinese New Year
Have spent today celebrating the Chinese New Year- firstly with the Brothers and Sisters of Kings Cross Chinese Methodist Church then with those that I live with in MCH. The celebrations with the Church began with a celebration service- was really good to share with them. Very kindly somebody interpreted the whole service- prayers the lot. As well as the service being translated into English- it was also translated from the Cantonese to Mandarin. Quite an experience! Some of the hymns as well were well known such as To God be the Glory! So we could all join together in different tongues. Was good to share in the celebration and to hear the sermon as well. Was interesting to ponder upon some of the challenges placed by the Minister Rev John Yapp. He was exploring some of the superstition that goes along with the Chinese New Year.
The service was followed by a wondeful meal! The Malaysian Methodist minister's wife here says that the Chinese live to eat rather than eat to live! There is always plenty of food! Its been a good day- although tonight I am very tired!
A great occassion! Its also been good today to be invited to do some more teaching of the British Born Chinese teenagers. I taught the group for January and they'd like me to do some more. So have accepted the invitation. We had some great times in January- the Chav version of the Lord's prayer and questions about images of Jesus and Why all angels are white, blue eyed and blonde haired? One of the teenagers replied what about the Chinese angels? Good question?? Why do we always westernise things?? The Minister who oversees the Chinese church has a picture of a Malaysian Jesus! So am waiting to see it! They are a great bunch so look forward to sharing again!
The service was followed by a wondeful meal! The Malaysian Methodist minister's wife here says that the Chinese live to eat rather than eat to live! There is always plenty of food! Its been a good day- although tonight I am very tired!
A great occassion! Its also been good today to be invited to do some more teaching of the British Born Chinese teenagers. I taught the group for January and they'd like me to do some more. So have accepted the invitation. We had some great times in January- the Chav version of the Lord's prayer and questions about images of Jesus and Why all angels are white, blue eyed and blonde haired? One of the teenagers replied what about the Chinese angels? Good question?? Why do we always westernise things?? The Minister who oversees the Chinese church has a picture of a Malaysian Jesus! So am waiting to see it! They are a great bunch so look forward to sharing again!
Saturday, 9 February 2008
"SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO??"
Well yesterday I met with my supervisor and my accompanist from Guy Chester Centre to discuss the possibility of Atlanta for the next stage of my pre-ordination training. Its an exchange that Wesley House in Cambridge (www.wesleycam.ac.uk) have with Candler School of theology (http://www.candler.emory.edu/)
I am being very indecisive- mainly apprehension. I would be initially applying (so may not get to go- if there were other applicants) any way, but am aware last year as soon as the person on the exchange at present expressed interest he went! Talking to Mark who is there at present he said he would recommend it! Everyone else is saying its a good oppurtunity and an oppurtunity I won't get again! Which of course is true. I think much of me being unsure is apprehension. Speaking to one of my university friends this afternoon though she said- you were aprehensive prior to university, the whole candidating process and so forth. Its clearly part of who I am looking back now- I have no regrets about going to University. I'd be a very different person today having not been. Although a bit cliche God was faithful through University and if I appply and go then there is no reason why that wouldn't be again! And indeed continuing to be in the mean time. I think being abroad would be good for me- something that I do have little experience of. So I am certainly open to the idea- there are a few things that I need to look at and questions to ask. Looking at what I need from my training and how that can be best fulfilled.
I would be doing modules which would be transferable to the UK (Wesley House) for an MA and would be doing any classes offered that I wanted. One of the things about Candler as I understand it is that it is lots of people my age training for minstry- very different from anything offered in this country for pre-ordination training.
So an exciting time, whilst being quite scary too!
I am being very indecisive- mainly apprehension. I would be initially applying (so may not get to go- if there were other applicants) any way, but am aware last year as soon as the person on the exchange at present expressed interest he went! Talking to Mark who is there at present he said he would recommend it! Everyone else is saying its a good oppurtunity and an oppurtunity I won't get again! Which of course is true. I think much of me being unsure is apprehension. Speaking to one of my university friends this afternoon though she said- you were aprehensive prior to university, the whole candidating process and so forth. Its clearly part of who I am looking back now- I have no regrets about going to University. I'd be a very different person today having not been. Although a bit cliche God was faithful through University and if I appply and go then there is no reason why that wouldn't be again! And indeed continuing to be in the mean time. I think being abroad would be good for me- something that I do have little experience of. So I am certainly open to the idea- there are a few things that I need to look at and questions to ask. Looking at what I need from my training and how that can be best fulfilled.
I would be doing modules which would be transferable to the UK (Wesley House) for an MA and would be doing any classes offered that I wanted. One of the things about Candler as I understand it is that it is lots of people my age training for minstry- very different from anything offered in this country for pre-ordination training.
So an exciting time, whilst being quite scary too!
Friday, 1 February 2008
Blood tests- urgh
I went back to my own Dr this morning- my glands are still swollen and I'm tired still! So he decided to do some blood tests- 5 in all- not quite sure what they are all for. He was slightly concerned about my thyroid not working properly- leaving me succeptable to infections. I asked about going back to work and he said I can go back on "light" duties! An interesting question- what are light duties for a minister?! Guessing it probably doesn't endorse the long days I sometimes do! Any way- I now have to wait for the results. They won't all be back for best part of two weeks- so unless anything abnormal is traced before then I won't hear anything till then.
I don't do ill very well and am quite determined to go back to London over the weekend! I am certainly not being off sick until the blood tests come back!
I don't do ill very well and am quite determined to go back to London over the weekend! I am certainly not being off sick until the blood tests come back!
Wednesday, 30 January 2008
the Language of Blessing
Recently I have been doing some theological wrestling! Back in September/ early October an encounter started me out on a journey. Two years ago whilst I was in Lancaster I was given a car. It came from the family of a supernumerary- who had recently died- they had no use for it and said to the Superintendent to give it to someone whose ministry it’d enhance. So the Superintendent asked would I appreciate it- it was a great gift and I saw it as a blessing from God and God providing for my needs. Indeed it did help with foundation training and with my preaching appointments. As some people know I am not the worlds best passenger in the mornings, this was sometimes a challenge- arriving after having been driven round the twists and turns out into the Lune Valley! So having a car meant I didn’t arrive at preaching appointments feeling sick and also meant that I was able to have freedom on my placement- especially with visiting in Silverdale. So I saw my car as provided by God- providing for my needs.
Any way so back early in my time in London, I was asked one night if I would sit outside the shower room in MCH whilst a homeless person used the shower. The woman clearly hadn’t had a shower in weeks and asked was it possible to have one. So without any time to prepare I was sitting outside one of the bathrooms. If I had known in advance I would have had a book to read. But the experience made me stop, think and be challenged.
I had, had 2 showers on this particular day. I began by looking at how fortunate I was- how blessed by God I was. I’d had 2 showers that day and had access to clean water, to showers without having to ask anybody, I could use them with dignity- not having to plead with someone to use their shower. As I sat, I thought- however if I am blessed by God then why should I be blessed by God and not others- EVERYONE ever created I believe is made in the image of God and is a child loved by God. So why therefore do I have the basic necessities that I need to live and not others- ok some people would say well you don’ t need a shower to survive- well no- but at the same time- people are actually dying on the streets of London because they have no shelter.
So I was challenged how do I handle my experience of God as provider and loving all people side by side? Especially in the light of this experience. I wrestled and asked lots of questions- at the moment I conclude that God provides for the world in the widest sense of the word- it is thus important that Christians engage seriously themselves and encourage others to consider what they have, how they steward it and share with those less fortunate, as well as engaging politically with social justice campaigns- to create change. Stewardship is often spoken of- that we might be a blessing to others.
(At some point I’ll add the flow chart I made to work through the issue).
So yes God blesses- but not in some kind of magical way! For too long I think I’ve been in fantasy land! God blessed the world- in creation, in his omnipresence- but God also gave stewardship and free will to humanity. I think there is also the bigger question of how we look at blessing- here its been very focussed on the material things needed for life. Yes perhaps this is wrong- but there are certain things that we do need for life, that a lot of people don’t have.
Following this and being aware that often in the congregations I am in there is the presence of those less fortunate materially- I have also been challenged on the language used about blessing in worship. Especially with reference to the offertory prayer: So often these are done extemporarily and make sweeping comments about God giving us all that we need. How when we make such sweeping comments do we include those who are on the margins of society? This is part of a much wider debate on language and inclusion- it isn’t just masculine/feminine language that is an issue!
As well as developing my understanding on Blessing, the experience has challenged me on a number of areas-
A) to be more aware of sweeping comments we make- they can sometimes be excluding and don’t necessarily express what we really mean when considered in depth.
B) To ask the basic questions of things!
C) Rather than just inheriting and excepting lots of teaching and theology- that what I believe is made my own- that is specific rather than so sweeping and broad!
Any way so back early in my time in London, I was asked one night if I would sit outside the shower room in MCH whilst a homeless person used the shower. The woman clearly hadn’t had a shower in weeks and asked was it possible to have one. So without any time to prepare I was sitting outside one of the bathrooms. If I had known in advance I would have had a book to read. But the experience made me stop, think and be challenged.
I had, had 2 showers on this particular day. I began by looking at how fortunate I was- how blessed by God I was. I’d had 2 showers that day and had access to clean water, to showers without having to ask anybody, I could use them with dignity- not having to plead with someone to use their shower. As I sat, I thought- however if I am blessed by God then why should I be blessed by God and not others- EVERYONE ever created I believe is made in the image of God and is a child loved by God. So why therefore do I have the basic necessities that I need to live and not others- ok some people would say well you don’ t need a shower to survive- well no- but at the same time- people are actually dying on the streets of London because they have no shelter.
So I was challenged how do I handle my experience of God as provider and loving all people side by side? Especially in the light of this experience. I wrestled and asked lots of questions- at the moment I conclude that God provides for the world in the widest sense of the word- it is thus important that Christians engage seriously themselves and encourage others to consider what they have, how they steward it and share with those less fortunate, as well as engaging politically with social justice campaigns- to create change. Stewardship is often spoken of- that we might be a blessing to others.
(At some point I’ll add the flow chart I made to work through the issue).
So yes God blesses- but not in some kind of magical way! For too long I think I’ve been in fantasy land! God blessed the world- in creation, in his omnipresence- but God also gave stewardship and free will to humanity. I think there is also the bigger question of how we look at blessing- here its been very focussed on the material things needed for life. Yes perhaps this is wrong- but there are certain things that we do need for life, that a lot of people don’t have.
Following this and being aware that often in the congregations I am in there is the presence of those less fortunate materially- I have also been challenged on the language used about blessing in worship. Especially with reference to the offertory prayer: So often these are done extemporarily and make sweeping comments about God giving us all that we need. How when we make such sweeping comments do we include those who are on the margins of society? This is part of a much wider debate on language and inclusion- it isn’t just masculine/feminine language that is an issue!
As well as developing my understanding on Blessing, the experience has challenged me on a number of areas-
A) to be more aware of sweeping comments we make- they can sometimes be excluding and don’t necessarily express what we really mean when considered in depth.
B) To ask the basic questions of things!
C) Rather than just inheriting and excepting lots of teaching and theology- that what I believe is made my own- that is specific rather than so sweeping and broad!
it's back AGAIN
Well after being back in London for 7 day I was signed off ill again on Monday. Last week was busy and emotionally draining. I went for my Guy Chester Centre days on Friday and Saturday. Didn't feel great whilst I was there- put it down to tiredness- but I felt quite uncomfortable and in pain. On Sunday night I really felt lousy again-looked at my throat and some white lumps had begun to appear again. Was set to work on Monday but when I got up on Monday morning felt lousy. With a lot of pain in my throat- so torch out again- could see lots more white lumps. So I went to the Dr's on Monday morning- she looked and said "that's the most spectacular sore throat I've seen in weeks." So she gave me another lot of antibiotics for tonsillitis and signed me off for at least a week and said I need to see a Dr again if I don't improve. Had spoken to Mum before she went to work- she said if I was signed off to come home. So I came home to Cambridge on Monday afternoon- have laid on the sofa and barely moved since. Am feeling very tired and still don't feel great- but today can at least move my arms and legs without them hurting too!
My main diet this week has consisted of trifle, ice cream and lucozade!
Any way a mid this- I've received an e-mail from connexion to talk about next academic year. So they are asking me to consider applying for the Candler School of theology exchange in Atlanta. This had been mentioned before. I have some questions and uncertainties- but connexion think it'd help my experience of multi-culture. So we will see, am hoping to talk to my supervisor and accompanists at Guy Chester centre soon. Its all a bit crazy- lots of people are saying great opportunity- I say I'd like some continuity in my training! Other wise I will have had four years in four places. The final decision won't be made till 20th May which seems a long way off! Guess I'll see where God leads!
any way, need some more rest
My main diet this week has consisted of trifle, ice cream and lucozade!
Any way a mid this- I've received an e-mail from connexion to talk about next academic year. So they are asking me to consider applying for the Candler School of theology exchange in Atlanta. This had been mentioned before. I have some questions and uncertainties- but connexion think it'd help my experience of multi-culture. So we will see, am hoping to talk to my supervisor and accompanists at Guy Chester centre soon. Its all a bit crazy- lots of people are saying great opportunity- I say I'd like some continuity in my training! Other wise I will have had four years in four places. The final decision won't be made till 20th May which seems a long way off! Guess I'll see where God leads!
any way, need some more rest
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